Wednesday, October 26, 2005
does anyone understand how it feels?no I believe not.does anyone understand what is happening?no I believe not.this is just part of my life. and part of life that all of us have to take. why? because I was born in this family. yes I am flustered, I can't sleep though I'm tired, I don't like all these. I couldn't choose where I was born. and neither did she choose to be born schizophrenic. these are the few things we can say: "I have no choice." other than these things, we usually have a choice. on the majority of 99 to 1. choice is what we have. I'm mentally tired. I dont want to have to make decisions still at this point in time. it's just something I dont want to do and I don't have to do it. it's been a long night and she's been crying and screaming most of the time. we called up the police.walking walking, walking on eggshells.just a crack in the carbon molecules and there you go, falling.that's risk, an everyday thing.I never know tomorrow. I don't know what thing's will be like. it's terrible. I dont know if will wake up hearing screams and cries. I dont know if I will wake up alone in the house. I dont know if I will wake up seeing my dusty ceiling. we never know. couz no one can affirm life everyday.it is 0516 hours as of now.and update 5 minutes later. I was reading some entires. and I wonder why I am so remembered by you. I was nice then but after that I acted like an idiot. just wanted you to think that I'm not the same and not harbour anymore hopes. i just felt like it was a need to make u move on to look for new grass. :) I still remember the things you did for me. thank you.
girlwithabroken(: : 05:24
